So, Elder Timothy Dyches and Elder Allen, 2 general authorities of the church came and spoke to us. And of course, President Deere. Ah, I have never felt the love of Christ so strongly as I do when that man speaks to us. He shines with the spirit. They all said some very important things and really made me think.
Elder Dyches asked us, ´´Which master are you serving in this mission?´´ and he invited us to ´´Forgive the old man, and forget the old man´´ that we once were. They talked to us about how we need to reprogram ourselves, and develop good habits. They talked a lot about self control, and how strong Satan´s pull is today in the world. We can´t even afford to get close the the line. We can´t allow ourselves to be pulled into the current, we have to use our agency to act in righteousness, or we eventually become an object to be acted upon. I was under the impression that most missionaries in the world had iPads, but actually they told us that there are only 86 that either have it or will be getting one very soon.
One thing that REALLY hit me was what Elder Allen said, he told us that we´re getting the technology is so that we can learn how to use it. First and foremost it´s to teach the use how to use technology righteously, and a side benefit is using it for proselyting. How honest it that? It´s like, when the age for missionary service was lowered, many people said, ´´the church is only doing it so that kids don´t get in trouble before.´´ In the conference they said that is one of the reasons why! Too many people were getting lost inbetween high school and mission time, so lowering the age saves people. The same goes for this technology- we are going to learn how to use it here so that in the transition from the mission to ´´normal life´´ we don´t get lost as we go back to using technology. Honestly, I am a little sad I don´t get more time out here to really practice that principle in this enviornment of the mission, but I can tell you that the Lord allowed me to be in the mission at this time so that I could attend that conference and learn some seriously important principles that will help me to not waste time on the internet like I did before.
He said that technology is like a pen, you dont just hold it in your hand and have the cap off, looking for things to write on- we wait until it will serve a purpose- THEN we pull it out. We have to learn to do to the same thing with technology. I don´t even want to think about all the hours I wasted, browing through the internet or my iPad, just looking for things to do. Elder Allen suggested getting into the habit of saying, ´´I´m not turning my phone on until I have defined what my purpose is.´´ If we want to know the weather, we pull it out, turn it on, look at the weather, then turn it off. He said that we have to raise our children up to a new level. He also talked about being transparent with what we do on the internet. We should feel comfortable with our families looking at our accounts, seeing what we´ve been up to on our phone. Also, in the handbooks on how to use technology the leaders of the church have created (that I will be taking home with me and studying regularly), it says that we should use technology when we´re stressed or tired- and it´s so true! It would help avoid so many problems.
This life is a fight against our natural man. A fight to help the spiritual overcome the physical. A fight to learn to put God first. I´m not afraid anymore, because I know where my loyalty lies. Yesterday in sunday school we talked about the difference between followers and disciples, and talked about the story of the young rich man. I was a little frustrated because people in the class kept bringing up tithing or giving possesions up for God. And it just hit me when we were reading the story that- This isn´t about money! It´s never been about money. I used to read that story, and the part where it says something about it being harder for a rich man to enter into heaven than for a camel to enter into an eye or something like that..and i thought, ´´Ha, menos mal that I´m not rich!´´ Wrong. I think what it means is, How difficult will it be for those that aren´t willing to put their all on the altar of sacrifice. And is it difficult to enter in, because we´re trying to get in but the Lord won´t let us? No. It will be difficult to enter in, because those things that occupy space in our hearts won´t let us enter into the gate. We will have a longing for those things that we have to drop at the gate. We will be weighed down and be walking to the gate at a slow pace, hesitantly approaching, having our thoughts and hearts set on the things of this world- and not just worldly possessions, but worldy desires, pride, lusts, negativity..we have to be willing to put all of that aside if we want to respond to the Saviors invitation to follow him. And one thing that hit me also, was that we can choose to physically do it. We can go to church every week, do visiting teaching, go to the temple, go on missions even and we can still miss the mark. That´s not the goal, the goal is to change. Those things are tools the Lord has given us to accomplish our goal- but we must keep the real goal in mind. The real goal is not just to not to bad things so we can make it to heaven, the goal isn´t even to do enough good to make it into Heaven- the goal is to change, to transform, to convert. So that when we see the gates of heaven in front of us it´s not a hesitant approach (for any reason, reasons of unworthiness or even reasons of hoping we did enough), it´s a full out sprint. And not because it´s a race, but because our hearts have been set on it all along. That´s where our hearts been, it hasn´t been in the world, but it´s been on our Father´s Kingdom. We won´t just deserve a place in His kingdom but we´ll desire it. We are not obligated- if we do things out of obligation it doesn´t serve for much. I read the Book of Mormon before the mission, but it was mostly because people told me it would bless my life and I figured I should do it. Now I run to it. I love it, not because I know it´s a commandment, but because a true love has grown in my heart, and now it truly is my favorite book.
I don´t know who´s life has been affected by my being here for the last 17, almost 18 months. But I do know, that with all my heart that this mission has been my salvation. Christ has lifted the burdens that I was carrying as I walked toward the kingdom. I was headed in that direction, but weighed down by worries and sins and just plain old distractions. I was going there, but at a slower pace, not allowing myself to fully embrace His gospel. I still have A TON to learn, but now I can walk, and run freely, because He´s lifted me from off the ground as I´ve repented of my sins, He has helped me to walk in a more straight direction as He has showed me that the things He has to offer are better than the distractions of the world, and He has helped me to run by strengthening my step, through His atonement He has not only given me strength but has given me desires to do His will.
I´m just really grateful for true conversion. I´m sure I´ll look back in the future and just laugh at how little I knew...And I hope so. I don´t ever want to stop learning and progressing. I want to live the gospel of Jesus Christ fully, every day. I want to be His disciple, forever. Sorry this was so long, it´s just been a good, and stressful week! Menos mal that my companions is the cutest and she wants to help me finish strong- I´ve still got a lot left in me!
Ah, I don´t have time, but I didn´t even tell you about the family we found! So fast, last sunday I had the feeling there was a family here in Dos Hermanas waiting and ready for us. So we prayed and searched and we met this man, ha, in a really funny way actually, but anyway, he said we could go and visit him, and he has an 18 year old wife (I think he´s like 23 ish) and a 1 1/2 year old daughter and they´re the cutest! Ah, so yeah, the wife is so super faithful and told us she´s willing to follow Christ to ´´another world´´ if she has to. So we´re excited about that. Excited to show her that other world that He has to offer her! A world that takes some faith to walk into, but we do it because we know that even though it comes with trials, it also comes with more happiness than we´ve ever experienced. At least that´s what I´ve seen in my life, and in my mission, and I´ll forever be grateful for it.
Happy mothers day, I love you all!
Love, Hermana Miller
John 6: 25-71
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